What a wonderful journey we've shared with our Progressive Poem! I have enjoyed so much watching this poem grow little by little, all the bold strokes and gentle touches, how each line adds a new layer, a new voice.
One of you commented about how it's been a lovely way to experience delayed gratification in our current sound-byte, instantaneous, rapid-fire world. I love that!
I don't know what exactly I was expecting, but I think I imagined a more haphazard result, a poem less cohesive. And now I read it, and I think, OF COURSE. Because that's the kind of community this is: loving, inspiring, supportive. Thank you, all of you, for sharing in this experience. I totally want to do it again next year!
And now for what I've done with the poem, as a way to wind up our adventure. I've used a technique that works for me again and again as I try to find the heart of my own poems. I've gone line by line and pulled out one word or one phrase and recrafted them, in order, to kind of distill the essence of the poem. And then I've added my own bit at the end to provide some closure.
You can use this technique on your own poems, or on famous poems. In a way, it's a form of "found" poetry. It's also just an excellent self-editing exercise. And what's interesting here is that if each of us was to address this particular poem, we'd wind up with 29 similar but different poems, as we each are drawn to different words and phrases for different reasons.
Here's my take:
Note
to Self
If you are hungry,
kick off a spell.
Dry your glass
secrets. Spill
out, breathe in.
Now, wish:
inside,
unfold a waltz.
How do broken veils
feed your heart?
Soul of coriander
and moonshine,
beware of too much
cushion. Trust
silver-tipped poetry.
Here: speckle
your life. Feast
on dream-dust.
And here's the uncut version, still title-less (suggestions, anyone?), but with a few adjustments to punctuation. Also, I tried the poem in triplets, and I really like the result:
ETA: Title courtesy of Kate Coombs!
Advice for a Dark Day
ETA: Title courtesy of Kate Coombs!
Advice for a Dark Day
If you are reading
this,
you must be hungry.
Kick off your silver slippers,
come sit with us a spell.
A hanky, here, now dry your tears
and fill your glass with wine.
Now, pour. The parchment has secrets,
smells of a Moroccan market spill-out.
You have come to the right place, just breathe
in.
Honey, mint, cinnamon, sorrow. Now, breathe
out
last week’s dreams. Take a wish from the jar.
Inside, deep inside, is the answer…
Unfold it, and let us riddle it together,
…Strains of a waltz. How do frozen fingers
play?
How do fennel, ginger, saffron blend in the tagine?
Like broken strangers bound by time, they
sisterdance…
their veils of sorrow encircle, embrace.
Feed your heart with waltzes and spices.
Feed your soul with wine and dreams.
Humble dust of coriander scents your feet,
coaxing
seascapes, crystal sighs and moonshine from
your melody.
Beware of dangers along the path of truth
and beware, my friend, of too much bewaring–
strong hands cushion you, sweet scents
surround you—now leap
without looking, guided by trust. And when you
land
on silver-tipped toes, buoyed by joy– you’ll
know
you are amazing, you are love, you
are poetry—
here, you rest.
Muse. Up ahead, stepping stones speckle the
stream, sturdy now.
May your words roar against the banks, your life a flood of dreams.
by
1 Irene at Live Your Poem
2 Doraine at Dori Reads
3 Jeannine at View from a Window Seat
4 Robyn at Read, Write, Howl
5 Susan at Susan Taylor Brown
6 Mary Lee at A Year of Reading
9 Gina at Swagger Writer's
10 Julie at The Drift Record
11 Kate at Book Aunt
12 Anastasia Suen at Booktalking
13 Tabatha at The Opposite of Indifference
14 Diane at Random Noodling
15 Ruth at There is No Such Thing as a Godforsaken Town
16 Natalie at Wading Through Words
17 Tara at A Teaching Life
18 Amy at The Poem Farm
19 Lori at Habitual Rhymer
20 Heidi at My Juicy Little Universe
21 Myra at Gathering Books
22 Pat at Writer on a Horse
23 Miranda at Miranda Paul Books
24 Linda at TeacherDance
25 Greg at Gotta Book
26 Renee at No Water River
27 Linda at Write Time28 Caroline at Caroline by Line
29 Sheri at Sheri Doyle
30 Irene at Live Your Poem
Oh, and if you get a chance, I'm a guest over at Katie Davis's blog, talking about 5 reasons why you should write poetry. Stop by!